The one who chose addiction over you...

 The things I have learned about addiction have really made me reevaluate how I will interact with those struggling through their turmoil.  You can do everything in your power to help people along their way and pour pure love into them during their struggles but that will never be enough. You will sacrifice yourself, your happiness, your mental health and only bring destruction upon your very life if you aren't careful.  Enabling an addict; whether it is alcohol or drugs makes no difference. I have seen so many people I love fall into a trap that they can't escape. I thought my love could save them through their despair. I thought I could prove that my love was something they would crave more than the drug itself. I would drop everything when I was told the person wanted change and desired a new life more than anything. The addiction will win the game every time until the addict wants to surrender to a new way of living. The people they think are there to help them are their partying friends. The addict will be confused and  think the partying buddies are the people who truly care. The only thing the addicts friends care about is losing their party buddy so they don't feel as though they have a problem themselves.   No matter how much you give, no matter how much you love and no matter how much you try to prove your loyalty it won't be enough. You will lose yourself along the way because you don't understand why you aren't enough.  I only found that during the process I became angry, outraged and felt like screaming at the top of my lungs. I became weary, distressed, tired and  became a person I didn't recognize.  You will feel crazy or the addict will make you feel crazy just know you don't need to remain in their chaos. Don't lose yourself trying to save someone who doesn't want to be saved through all their broken promises. ' Remember if you have the same struggles an addict or alcoholic will never change for you. They have to change for themselves. You can only love so much, give so much and care too much before you lose your self worth. Please if you are struggling with addiction or someone you know is try to be as kind to yourself or them, as possible. Encourage them to seek help because you aren't a professional that can't help the addict. Never feel defeated by their choices. You did what you did because you truly loved them. I know you thought you could save the addict but it is up to the addict to want to save him or herself. Be there for them whenever they need a friend, someone to talk to and remind them that you will always love them even if it means from afar. If the addict or alcoholic ever chooses to surrender make it known that you will be there to help them along their journey. Never give up hope...because hope turns to Faith and Faith turns works into reality... Believe when it doesn't seem possible because the power of prayer can change a multitude of circumstances. For all who are going through the battles my heart is with you and my faith is with you... much love from my heart to yours